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「english笑话」英文短笑话

作者:东东笑话网2021-03-15 05:34类型:爆笑男女笑话 已有57人围观 点击提交给百度收录

英文短笑话

1、Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home.老师:谁能回到我下一个问题,谁就可以回家了。One boy throws his bag out the window.一个小男孩把书包扔到窗外。Teacher: who just threw that?!老师:谁刚刚把书包扔出去了?Boy: Me! I’m going home now.男孩:我!我现在要回家了。2、What dog can jump higher than a building?什么狗比大楼跳的还高?Anydog, buildings can't jump!任何一只狗,大楼又跳不起来。3、What has a head, a tail, and no body?什么有头、有尾,但是没有身体?A coin!硬币。4、What has one eye but cannot see?什么有一只眼睛,却看不见?A needle.针。5、Wife: "How would you describe me?"妻子:你会怎么形容我呢?Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."丈夫:ABCDEFGHIJK.Wife: "What does that mean?"妻子:那是什么意思?Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."丈夫:迷人的、魅力的、可爱的、令人愉悦的、优雅的、时髦的、漂亮的和火辣的。Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"妻子:哇,谢谢,但是“IJK”是什么意思呢?Husband: "I'm just kidding!"丈夫:开个玩笑!6、Boy: Is this seat empty?男孩:这个座位是空的么?Girl: Yes and this one will be if you sit down.女孩:是的,如果你坐下,我的座位也将是空的。 7、My little dog can't read 我的狗不识字Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!布朗夫人:哦,亲爱的,我把珍爱的小狗给丢了!Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!史密斯夫人:可是你该在报纸上登广告啊!Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read. 布朗夫人:没有用的,我的小狗不认识字。” 8、My Wife Will Exchange Them反正我太太明天会来换的A gentleman walks into a store and asked for a pair of gloves.一位先生走进一家商店要买副手套。″Cloth or leather﹖″ asked the salesperson.“您是要布的还是皮的?”售货员问。″Makes no difference ″replied customer.“没什么区别。”这位顾客回答。″What color﹖″ asked the clerk.“那您要什么颜色的呢?”售货员又问。″Any″ he responded.“什么颜色都成。”他回答。″Size﹖″“号码呢?”″Give me whatever you prefer″ the gentleman said slightly exasperated. ″My wife will be back tomorrow to exchange them.″ “您就随便给我拿一副吧,”这位顾客有点不耐烦了,“反正我太太明天都会来换的。”

急求English的小笑话

英语笑话故事 He Won Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen? Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won. 他赢了 汤姆:约翰尼,你小弟弟好吗? 约翰尼:他害病卧床了。他受了伤。 汤姆:真糟糕,怎么回事儿? 约翰尼:我们做游戏,看谁能把身子探出窗外最远,他赢了。 I Have His Ear in My Pocket Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan. "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother. "I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket." 他的耳朵在我衣兜里 伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?” “一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。 “再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。 “他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。” A Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy." 好孩子 小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。 “昨天给你的钱干什么了?” “我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?” “她是个卖糖果的。” Drunk One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!" 醉酒 一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。” “可是,爸爸, ”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!” Hospitality The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy. 好客 由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上,先生。”那小男孩说。 英语小笑话 上个星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一个老美看到就笑我说, "Do you know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著 性, 缩写正好是 Adidas) " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快, 联想力这么丰富时,旁边的 一个老美帮我解围, 他说, 有一个很著名的合唱团 Korn, 他们的招牌歌之一就是 A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟 能详的喔! 下次就换你去取笑老美了.

简短的英文笑话

正数最后 妈妈:儿子,这次考试你是不是又得了倒数第一? 儿子:没有,但是我得了正数的最后。 The positive number is bitter end Mother: You are from the bottom first of This time took a test? Son: Does not have, but my positive number bitter end.

笑话的英文

joke 音标:英 [dʒəʊk]美 [dʒoʊk] 词典释义 joken.笑话,玩笑;笑柄,笑料 jestn.笑话,玩笑;戏谑,诙谐;笑柄 japev.开玩笑 数据来源:金山词霸 例句 1.他喜欢笑话。 He loves a joke. 《汉英大词典》 2.你听过那个关于爱尔兰人、英国人和美国人的笑话吗? Have you heard the one about the Irishman, the Englishman and the American? 《柯林斯高阶英汉双解学习词典》 3.那只不过是句玩笑话。 That's only a joke. 《汉英大词典》

英语小笑话

1、A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait.Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying "A dollar per  point."The next class the professor handed the tests back out. This student got back his test and $64 change.一天,教授正在给学生们监考。他发下试卷,然后回到讲台前等待。考试结束了,学生们纷纷交回试卷。教授发现一张试卷上别着一张百元钞票,还有一张纸条写着:“一分一块钱。”第二堂课,教授把试卷都发回学生们手中。其中一个学生不但得到了试卷还得到64块钱的找零。2、George comes from school on the first of September."George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother."I didn't like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too..."9月1日, 乔治放学回到家里。“乔治,你喜欢你们的新老师吗?” 妈妈问。“妈妈,我不喜欢,因为她说3加3得6, 可后来又说2加4也得6。”3、Kate: Mom, do you know what I'm going to give you for your birthday?Mom: No, Honey, what?Kate: A nice teapot.Mom: But I've got a nice teapot.Kate: No, you haven't. I've just dropped it.凯特:妈妈,你知道我要给你一件什么生日礼物吗?妈妈:不知道,宝贝,是什么呀?凯特:一把漂亮的茶壶。妈妈:可是我已经有一把漂亮的茶壶了呀。凯特:不,你没有了。我刚刚把它给摔了。4、Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?"Hotel Host: "I can't imagine, unless it's because you have the plate he usually eats from."客人:“为什么你的狗狗坐在那儿老是看着我吃东西呢?”旅馆主人:“我不敢想象,除非是因为你拿了它经常用来吃东西的盘子了。”5、Dentist: Please stop howling. I haven't even touched your tooth yet.Patient: I know. But you are standing on my foot!牙医:请不要再叫了,我都还没有挨着你的牙齿啊!病人:但是,亲,你可知道,你踩到我脚了!!!6、A father of five came home with a toy, summoned his children and asked which one of them should be given the present, “Who is the most obedient, never talks back tomother and does everything he or she is told?” he inquired. There was silence and then a chorus of voices: “You play with it, Daddy!”一个有五个孩子的父亲带着一件玩具回到家里,把孩子们召集来问这件礼物应该给谁。“谁最听话,从不和妈妈顶嘴,让干什么就干什么?”他问道。大家都不吭声。过了一会儿,孩子们异口同声地说:“爸爸,您玩儿吧。”

拓展资料

第一则 Teacher:Why are you late for school every morning?Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go slow".第二则Teacher: Can you make a sentence with the word "egg"?Student: Yes. I ate a piece of cake yesterday.Teacher: Then where is the "egg"?Student: In the cake, Sir.第三则George comes from school on the first of September.George, how did you like your new teacher? asked his mother.I didn't like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too.....

英文笑话

A Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy." 好孩子 小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。 “昨天给你的钱干什么了?” “我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?” “她是个卖糖果的。” Nest and Hair My sister, a primary school teacher, was informed by one of her pupils that a bird had built its nest in the tree outside the classroom. "What kind of bird?" my sister asked. "I didn't see the bird, ma' am, only the nest," replied the child. "Then, can you give us a description of the nest?" my sister encouraged her . "Well, ma'am, it just resembles your hair. " Notes: (1) inform v.告诉 (2) nest n.窝;巢 (3) description n.描述 (4) encourage v.鼓励 (5) resemble v. 相似;类似 18.鸟窝与头发 我姐姐是一位小学老师。一次一个学生告诉她说一只鸟儿在教室外 的树上垒了个窝。 “是什么鸟呢?”我姐姐问她。 “我没看到鸟儿,老师,只看到鸟窝。”那孩子回答说。 “那么,你能给我们描述一下这个鸟巢吗?”我姐姐鼓励她道。 “哦,老师,就像你的头发一样。” I've Just Bitten My Tongue "Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother. "Yes, dear," she replied - "Why do you ask?" "Cause I've just bitten my tongue! " Notes: (1) poisonous adj.有毒的 (2) Cause I've just bitten my tongue 因为我刚咬了自己的舌头。 句中 Cause 是 Because 的缩略形式。 我刚咬破自己的舌头 “我们有毒吗?”一个年幼的蛇问它的母亲。 “是的,亲爱的,”她回答说,“你问这个干什么?” “因为我刚刚咬破自己的舌头。” A Woman Who Fell It was rush hour and I was dashing to a train in New York City's Grand Central Terminal - As I neared the gate, a plump, middle-aged woman sprinted up from behind, lost her footing on the smooth marble floor and slid onto her back. Her momentum carried her close to my shoes. Before I could help her, however, she had scrambled up. Gaining her composure, she winked at me and said, "Do you always have beautiful women failing at your feet?" 摔倒的女人 上下班高峰期,我匆匆奔向纽约豪华中心站去赶一趟火车。接近门口,一位肥胖的中年妇女从后面冲过来,没想到在平滑的大理石地面上失了脚,仰面滑倒了。她的惯性使她接近了我的脚。我正准备扶她,她却自己爬了起来。她镇定了一下,对我挤了一下眉,说道:“总是有漂亮女人拜倒在你脚下吗?” 英语笑话(一) Q: What's the difference between a monkey and a flea? A: A monkey can have fleas, but a flea can't have monkeys. 猴子会和跳蚤有什么不同呢?你可能会直接的想到它们俩是一大一小。但除此之外呢,那就是猴子身上可以长跳蚤,而跳蚤身上却不能有猴子。这个答案很有意思吧? Q: How can you most irritate a farmer? A: By treading on his corn? 如果你踩了农夫的玉米或是谷物,他肯定会生气的;而如果你踩了农夫脚底的鸡眼,他会更生气。Corn既可以表示“玉米/谷物”,也有“鸡眼”的意思。 Q: Which is the strongest creature in the world? A: The snail. It carries its house on its back. 因为snail(蜗牛)的后背上总是背着一所房子,所以说蜗牛是世界上最强壮的生物是不足为奇的。你说呢? Q: What do people do in a clock factory? A: They make faces all day. 一看到make faces这个短语,你可千万别以为是在钟表厂工作的人整天都做鬼脸呀!因为除了这个意思以外,它还可以从字面上解释为制造钟面。 Q: How do you stop a sleepwalker from walking in his sleep? A: Keep him awake. 怎样才能不让梦游者(sleepwalker)梦游(walk in his sleep)呢?最简单的方法就是不让他睡觉。虽然这不是治疗方法,但如果让梦游者醒着呢,他的确就不会去梦游了。 英语笑话(二) He is really somebody -- My uncle has 1000 men under him. -- He is really somebody. What does he do? -- A maintenance man in a cemetery. 他真是一个大人物 -- 我叔叔下面有1000个人。 -- 他真是一个大人物。干什么的? -- 墓地守墓人。 英语笑话(三) Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience. At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America." 它们是从美国直接带来的 一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久,到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。在银行柜台,银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票,看是否有假。 这种做法让老妇人很不耐烦,最后实在忍耐不住说:“相信我,先生,也请你相信这些钞票。这都是真正的美元,它们是从美国直接带来的。” 英语笑话(四)my little dog can't read Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog! Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers! Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read. 我的狗不识字 布朗夫人:哦, 亲爱的,我把珍爱的小狗给丢了! 史密斯夫人:可是你该在报纸上登广告啊! 布朗夫人:没有用的,我的小狗不认识字。” 英语笑话(五)Bring me the winner -- Waiter, this lobster has only one claw. -- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight. -- Well, bring me the winner then. 给我那个打赢的吧 -- 服务员, 这个龙虾只有一只爪。 -- 对不起,先生,这只肯定打过架了。 -- 哦, 那给我那个打赢的吧。 英语笑话(六)The mean man's party. The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot." "Why use my elbow and foot?" "Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-hangded, are you?" 吝啬鬼请客 一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说:“你上到五楼,找中间那个门,然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了之后,再用你的脚把门推开。” “为什么要用我的肘和脚呢?” “你的双手得拿礼物啊。天哪,你总不会空着手来吧?”吝啬鬼回答。

简单的英语笑话

内容来自用户:乐图数据 一个简单易懂的英语笑话 篇一:简单英语小笑话 heisreallysomebody --myunclehas1000menunderhim. --heisreallysomebody.whatdoeshedo? --Amaintenancemaninacemetery. 他真是一个大人物 --我叔叔下面有1000个人。 --他真是一个大人物。干什么的? --墓地守墓人。 mylittledogcan'tread mrs.brown:oh,mydear,Ihavelostmypreciouslittledog! mrs.smith:butyoumustputanadvertisementinthenewspapers! mrs.brown:It'snouse,mylittledogcan'tread. 我的狗不识字 布朗夫人:哦, 亲爱的,我把珍爱的小狗给丢了! 史密斯夫人:可是你该在报纸上登广告啊! 布朗夫人:没有用的,我的小狗不认识字。” bringmethewinner --waiter,thislobsterhasonlyoneclaw. --I'msorry,sir.Itmusthavebeeninafight. --well,bringmethewinnerthen. 给我那个打赢的吧 --服务员, 这个龙虾只有一只爪。 --对不起,先生,这只肯定打过架了。 --哦,那给我那个打赢的吧。 goodboy LittleRobertaskedhismotherfortwocents."whatdidyoudowiththemoneyIgaveyouyesterday?" "Igaveittoapooroldwoman,"heanswered. "You'reagoodboy,"saidthemotherproudly."herearetwocentsmore.butwhyareyousointerestedintheoldwoman?" "sheistheonewhosellsthecandy." 好孩子 小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。 “昨天给你的钱干什么

简单爆笑的英文小笑话(要翻译的)

I Wasn't Asleep When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep,  and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "Wake up, sir!" "I wasn't asleep," the man answered. "Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed." "I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car." 我没有睡着 当一群妇女上车之后,车上的座位全都被占满了。售票员注意到一名男子好象是睡着了,他担心这个人会坐过站,就用肘轻轻地碰了碰他,说:“先生,醒醒!” “我没有睡着。”那个男人回答。 “没睡着?可是你眼睛都闭上了呀?” “我知道,我只是不愿意看到在拥挤的车上有女士站在我身边而已。” The poor husband "You can't imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife," the man complained to his friend. "She asks me a question, then answers it herself, and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong. 可怜的丈夫 “你根本无法想象和我妻子打交道是多么的难,”一个男人对他的朋友诉苦说,“她问我一个问题,然后自己回答了,过后又花半个小时跟我解释为什么我的答案是错的。”Where is the father? Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings. "Look," said the elder brother. "How nice these paintings are!" "Yes," said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children. Where is the father?" The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, "Obviously he was painting the pictures." 父亲在哪儿? 兄弟俩在看一些漂亮的油画。 “看,”哥哥说,“这些画多漂亮呀!” “是啊,”弟弟说道,“可是在所有这些画中,只有妈妈和孩子。那爸爸去哪儿了呢?” 哥哥想了会儿,然后解释道:“很明显,他当时正在画这些画呗。” Does the dog know the proverb, too? The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog. "It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?" "Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?" 狗也知道这个谚语吗? 一个小男孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。 “没有关系,”一位先生说,“不用害怕,你知道这条谚语吗:‘吠狗不咬人。’” “啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道吗?” 一 Can we have our teacher back? Once a superintendent of schools was visiting a three-room school. One room was very noisy, so the man grabbed a tall boy who had been standing up talking. He took the boy into another room and stood him in the corner. Five minutes later, a smalll boy came out of the first room and said, "When can we have our teacher back?" 能让我们的老师回去吗? 有一次,一位督学去视察一个只有三间教室的学校。一间教室非常吵闹,因此督学抓住其中一个正在站着说话的人,把他带进另一间教室,并让他站在墙角。五分钟以后,一个小男孩从第一间教室走进来,问道,“您什么时候能让我们的老师回去呢?” 二 Who's More Polite? A fat man and a skinny man were arguing about who was the more polite. The skinny man said he was more polite because he always tipped his hat to ladies. But the fat man knew he was more courteous because, whenever he got up and offered his seat, two ladies could sit down. 谁更有礼貌? 一个胖子和一个瘦子在争论谁更有礼貌。瘦子说他更有礼貌,因为他经常对女士摘帽示意。但是胖子认为他更有风度,因为无论什么时候他在车上给别人让座时,总有两位女士能坐下。 三 Expensive Price Dentist: I'm sorry, madam, but I'll have to charge you twenty-five dollars for pulling your son's tooth. Mother: Twenty-five dollars! But I thought you only charged five dollars for an extraction. Dentist: I usually do. But your son yelled so loud, he scared four other patients out of the office. 昂贵的代价 牙科医生:对不起,夫人,为给您的儿子拔牙,我得收二十五美元。 母亲:二十五美元!可是我知道您拔一颗牙只要五美元呀? 牙科医生:是的。但是您儿子这么大声地叫唤,他都吓跑四位病人了 A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill." "I am afraid that he is dead."said the doctor, Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive." "Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!" 一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:"我想他伤得很厉害."医生说:"我怕他已经死了."听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:"我没死,我还活着."妻子说:"安静,医生比你懂得多." The busis very crowded.Aman tries to get on,but no one gives way to him. "Hey,let me get on the bus."the man shouts. "It's too crowded.You'd better take the next bus."a passenger says to him. "But you can't go withou me.I'm the driver."the man says. 公共汽车上很拥挤.一位男士想上车,但是没有人给他让路. "喂,让我上车!"那位男士喊道. "车太挤了,你最好坐下一辆"车上的一位乘客对他说. "但是没有我你们走不了.我是司机!"那位男士说道. One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!" 一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。” “可是,爸爸, ”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!” The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy. 由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上,先生。”那小男孩说。 One day an old lady went to see her doctor, the doctor ask "how old are you?" The old lady think for a while and she said" when i was marry i was 18 and my husband is thirty Five. Now my husband is seventy years old it is twice of thirty five, so i am 36 years old."... 一天一位老太太去看医生,医生问:“女士,您多大岁数了?”然后老太太想了一会说:“我结婚那年我18岁,我老公35岁,现在他70岁了,是35的两倍,所以我应该是36岁”。。。。。。。。。。 TOM'S EXCUSE Teacher: Tom, why are you late for school every day? Tom: Every time I come to the corner, a sign says, "School-Go Slow". 汤姆的借口 老师:汤姆,您为什么每天上学迟到? 汤姆:我每次路过拐角,一个路标上面写着:"学校----慢行。" Doctor: Your cough sounds much better today. Patient: It should. I've been practicing all night. 医生:听上去你咳嗽今天好多了。 病人:应该如此。我昨晚练习了一整夜。

英文笑话有哪些?

1.A bit of advice for those about to retire. If you are only 65, never move to a retirement community. Everybody else is in their 70s, 80s, or 90s. So when something has to be moved, lifted or loaded, they yell,'Get the kid.' 这里想对将要退休者提一点忠告。如果你只有65岁的话,千万别进退休社区。因为那里人人都七八十岁或者八九十岁了。每当要搬东西,抬东西或者装东西时,他们就叫喊,“让小的干吧。”

英文版的笑话

A cat and her four kittens ran into a large dog. When the kittens cowered, the cat let out a series of loud barks, scaring the dog away. Turning to her kittens, the cat said, You see how important it is to know a second language.
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