「斗瘦冷笑话」蚂蚁斗大象中冷笑话 要经典的

蚂蚁斗大象中冷笑话 要经典的

一天，蚂蚁和大象去看电影，蚂蚁找了个位子坐下，这时，大象坐在了蚂蚁前面挡住了蚂蚁，蚂蚁很生气，跑到大象前面怒气冲冲地对大象说：哈哈，被挡住胡感觉爽不爽？望采纳

求斗地主的冷笑话。越多越好……拜托各位了 3Q

1.老爸退休，闲来无事在家一边视频一边玩大发斗地主，某天，老爸被两个人合起来欺负，嘴里骂着街，但又不会打字，急的一声汗。我在旁边看着偷笑。突然，老爸起身，拿A4纸在上面写个大大的“傻B”，挂在摄像头前，继续和那两人打牌。 2.下课铃响了，老师微笑的对全班说：“吵着要放学的同学不要慌，不会拖堂，请吃方便面的同学不要聊天了。叫后排打扑克的同学安静下，以免影响前排同学睡觉。靠窗看风景的同学，喊下操场打篮球的同学，我好布置作业。顺路的同学记得通知在网吧的打大发斗地主同学今天的作业。 3. 女网友给自己起了个网名，叫做：“五大三粗！”男网友问她：“为什么你要叫这样男性化的名字呢？”女网友回复道：“这还不是我想怀念下那曾经在大发斗地主认识的的八个男朋友嘛。” 以上冷笑话由大发斗地主1000元锦标赛上届冠军“夜闯尼姑庵”提供。全3D在线网络游戏大发斗地主。目前注册送5元哦。~ http://www.cddwt.net/?m=DAbaiduzhidau

十万个冷笑话里黄飞鸿和霍元甲文斗几何

两个不算是一个地方的，所以不好说，只是无数霍元甲(1868年7月～1910年)清末著名爱国武术家。字俊卿，祖籍河北省东光安乐屯(属沧州地区)，世居天津静海小南河村(今属天津市)，为精武体育会创始人。他的武艺出众，又执仗正义，继承家传“迷踪拳”绝技，先后在天津和上海威震西洋大力士，是一位家喻户晓的英雄，他的一生虽然短暂，但却轰轰烈烈，充满传奇色彩。1910年6月1日，霍元甲在农劲荪等武术界同仁协助下，在上海创办了“中国精武体操会”(后改名精武体育会)。9月，日本柔道会会长率十余名技击高手与霍较艺，败在霍的手下。日本人奉以酒筵，席间见霍呛咳，荐日医为治，霍公一生坦直，不意中毒于9月14日身亡。终年42岁。

十万个冷笑话圣斗士星矢篇这集恶搞哪一集的？

没有恶搞哪一集呀，好像说下月要连续出两级哟， 这集好像就有三分多钟…………

十万个冷笑话2四娃五娃战斗力怎么样 四娃五娃介绍

十万个冷笑话2四娃五娃战斗力怎么样 四娃五娃介绍，在十万个冷笑话2手游中除了七娃以外其他福禄娃都算是新手过度卡牌，给大家介绍下游戏中的四娃和五娃，那么他们战斗力怎么样呢，赶紧来看看吧!四娃火娃:烈焰帅哥帮你度过新手期火娃是一张R阶卡牌，这张卡牌的三围中攻击力十分不错可以在前期做一张打手牌，大招是强力的单体攻击，伤害在前期十分可观，大招有几率触发灼伤效果可以给敌方造成持续的灼伤掉血，这个特效在中前期十分实用。总体来说四娃是一张前期攻击力还算不错的卡牌。非常适合新手玩!五娃水娃:消防队长为你暑期降降温水娃也是一张不错的前期卡牌，和火娃一样是一张R阶的单体伤害卡牌，和火娃不同的是水娃攻击力略逊一筹，但整体三围要高过火娃，简单说就是不像火娃那般脆皮，大招的单体伤害也是十分强力的大招，水娃在游戏前期可以充当前排角色，这是火娃无法做到的。四娃、五娃在游戏前中期是十分不错的过度卡牌，在游戏中后期玩家得到的卡牌数目多了这两张牌自然可以替换掉，整体来说这两张R阶卡牌相对于其他R阶卡牌来看还不算鸡肋，玩家有一定的理由前中期用他们替换一些新手卡牌。

十万个冷笑话圣斗士篇中间两分钟的时候唱的葫芦娃！求MP3！

请采纳我的问题 　1、一个女生前一天晚上得到男朋友的订婚戒指，但竟没有一个同学注意到，令她忿忿不平。到下午大家坐着谈天的时候，她突然站起来大声说：“哎呀，这里真热呀，我看我还是把戒指脱下来吧。”2、女主人把女佣叫到面前问她：“你是否怀孕了？”“是啊！”女佣回道。“亏你还说得出口，你还没有结婚，难道不觉得害羞吗？”女主人再次训。“我为什么要害羞，女主人你自己不也怀孕了吗？”“可是我怀的是我丈夫的！”女主人生气地反驳。“我也是啊！”女佣高兴地附和。3、一个人骑摩托车喜欢反穿衣服，就是把口子在后面扣上，可以挡风。一天他酒后驾驶， 翻了，一头栽在路旁。警察赶到：警察甲：好严重的车祸。警察乙：是啊，脑袋都撞到后面去了。警察甲：嗯，还有呼吸，我们帮他把头转回来吧。警察乙：好.....一、二使劲，转回来了。警察甲：嗯，没有呼吸了.......4、在一条七拐八拐的乡村公路上，因为时常发生车祸，所以常常有一些鬼故事发生，有一天晚上，有一个出租车司机看见路边有一个长发披肩，身着白衣的女人向他招手，因为这个司机没有见过鬼，所以大胆的停下来让她上车了，这一路上,司机虽然不信有鬼，心里也毛毛的，所以时常从后视镜看后面的女人，开着开着，突然司机发现那个女人不见了！司机吓了一大跳，赶紧踩了一个刹车！只见那个女人满脸是血，表情狰狞。司机吓的牙直打颤。突然那女人开口了：“你会不会开车啊！我低头系个鞋带你突然一刹车我把鼻子都撞破了……”5、一个病人去看病，医生检查了他，皱着眉头说：“您病得太严重了，恐怕不会活多久了。” 病人：“求您告诉我我还能活多久？” 医生：“十……” 病人着急地问：“十什么？十年？？十个月？？？十天？？？？？” 医生：“十，九，八，七，六，五……”6、老师：“你能说一些18世纪科学家共同特点吗？”学生：“能，他们都死了。”7、犀粪蜣和蚊子谈恋爱，蜣问蚊子是做什么工作的，蚊子说：“护士，打针的。”蜣一拍大腿：“缘分呐，我是中药局搓药丸的…”8、一非洲人住在某一宾馆。夜半，起火，不明原因。非洲人见状顾不了那么许多，光着身子就跑出去了。消防员见状惊呼：“我的妈呀！都烧的糊了吧区的了还能跑那么快！”9、一个人想出国考察，但必须得到老总批准。于是他向老总请示，老总给了他一张字条，上面写着：“Go ahead”。 那人想：“Go ahead=前进，老总是批准了。”于是他开始打点行李。 一个同事见到了他问：“你在做什啊？？”他说：“我准备出国考察，老总批准了，给我写了‘Go ahead’。” 同事一见条就乐了：“咱们老总根本就没批准！！咱老总的英语水平你还不知道，他这是在说去个头！”10、牧师对买了他马和马车的农夫说：“这匹马只能听懂教会的语言，叫"感谢上帝"它就跑;叫"赞美上帝"它才停下。”农夫将信将疑，他试着喊了一声感谢上帝，那匹马立刻飞奔起来，越跑越快。一只跑到悬崖边上惊恐的农夫才想起让它停下来的口令“赞美上帝”。果然，马停下来了。死里逃生的农夫长出一口气：“感谢上帝………” 我打了很久，请采纳 1 the night before, a girl get boyfriend engagement ring, but no one noticed the classmate, make her antics. You sit and chat in the afternoon, she suddenly stood up and shouted: \"oh, it's really hot in here, I think I'd better take off your ring.\" 2, the mistress called the maid to ask her: \"are you pregnant?\" \"Yes!\" The maid answered. Export \"kui you still say, you are not married, don't you feel shy?\" The hostess training again. \"Why should I be shy, you don't the hostess also pregnant?\" \"But I conceive is my husband!\" The hostess retorted angrily. \"Me too!\" The maid happy to echo. 3, a man riding a motorcycle like the dress, is to cut on the back, can the wind. Drunk driving one day, he turned over, a planted on the road. Police: police a: a good serious car accident. Policeman b: yes, his head hit the back. Po1: well, still breathing, let's help him turn his head back. Po2: good... One, two, turn back. Policeman a: well, not breathing... 4, turn in a curvy country road, because often in a car accident, so often have some ghost story, one night, there's a taxi driver saw the side of the road have a long hair shawls, dressed in a white woman waved to him, because the driver didn't see a ghost, so bold stopped to let her get on the bus, along the way, the driver doesn't believe in ghosts, the in the mind also maomao, so often the woman behind the rearview mirror to see, open open, the driver found the woman suddenly disappeared! The driver startled, hurriedly stepped on a brake! I saw the woman face is blood, grim expression. The driver frighten of teeth chatter. Suddenly the woman spoke: \"would you drive! I bow to fasten shoelaces are you smashed through a sudden brake my nose...\" 5, a patient to see a doctor, the doctor examined him, frowning said: \"you too serious ill, I'm afraid I won't live much longer.\" Patient: \"please tell me how long will I live?\" Doctor: \"ten...\" Patient anxiously asked: \"what? Ten years?? Ten months??? Ten days?????\" Doctor: \"ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five...\" 6, teacher: \"can you say some 18 th-century scientists common characteristics?\" Student: \"yes, they are all dead.\" 7, rhino poop Qiang and mosquito fall in love, Qiang asked a mosquito is to do what work, the mosquito said: \"nurse, give or take an injection.\" Qiang a clap a thigh: \"the fate, I am a traditional Chinese medicine bureau rub pills...\" 8, the africans live in a hotel. In the midnight, a fire, unknown reason. Before rushing so many africans, naked and ran out. Firefighters said exclaimed: \"my mama ah! All paste the burned area can run so fast!\" 9, a person wants to go abroad, but it must be approved by boss. So he to the manager for instructions, the boss gave him a note, it read: \"Go ahead\". The man thought, \"Go ahead = progress, boss is approved.\" So he started to packing. A colleague to see he asked: \"what are you doing?\" He said: \"I'm ready to Go abroad investigation, boss approved, wrote me 'Go ahead'.\" Colleague of joy at the sight of article: \"let's boss haven't approved!!!!! Our boss English don't you know, he is said to head!\" 10, priests to buy his horse and carriage of the farmer said, \"this horse can only understand the language of the church, call\" thank god \"it ran; called\" praise god \"it didn't stop.\" Farmer track, he tried to thank god gave a cry, the horse gallop, immediately ran faster and faster. A run to the edge of the cliff frightened farmer remembered that let it stop password \"praise god\". Sure enough, the horse stopped. Close the farmer grows a sigh: \"thank god.........\" I played for a long time, please

求十万个冷笑话第五集里面那个圣斗士主题曲前奏的葫芦娃那个片尾曲，谢谢

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